AND WE'RE BACK WITH THE DEFINITIVE TIE BREAKER ROUND!!!
Jo: Everybody sit down! We are live! Johnny, why don't you wipe that smirk on your face and give us a warning from now on, you loon?
Johnny Olson: You got it, hoss.
Jo: I told you not to call me that outside of my trailer, you bozo!
Johnny: Ow! Harder! I mean...uh...Stop!
Contestant in the corner: Hey, can we hurry this up so you can match me?
Jo: Love the shirt.
Contestant in the corner: Thanks, Jo, baby. Get on with it.
Jo: Right.
Jo: On to the tiebreaker round between reigning champ, MelMac, and bulldog challenger, Claye. Claye, you got first dibs on the big Super Match, so we will start with you.
Jo: Claye?
Claye: This is the easiest money I ever made, old boy. My answer is
H.M. "HOWLING MAD" Murdock.
Jo: That is one of THE definitive answers! Great job, Claye. Let's see who you matched! Ms. B?
Ms. B: I didn't match, but I have a definitive answer.
Jo: Can I see it?
Ms. B: I left it at Ralph's place.
Jo: Ms. B....
Ms. B: Fine. Cab.
Jo: Another definitive answer, but no match.
Jo: Helane, what did you say?
Helane: I didn't say anything.
Jo: You left it blank.
Helane: No, I WROTE it down. HAHAHAHAHAHA! I am so funny...I could be on TV.
Jo: You couldn't sell Vitameatavegamin to an AA convention on opening night!
Helane: Why you little---
Mr. T: If you fools don't quit that jibba jabba, I'm gonna bust some heads. Me and my talkin' fist, Knockout!
Captain Cab: And me, Captain Cab! With my talking dog, Socky!
Socky: Hey gang!
B.A: You crazy, Foo'! Get outta here! I am doin' da mediatin'! Now, you two play nice...or ELSE!
Helane: Okay.
Jo: Okay.
Helane: I have never really seen the A-TEAM, so I said Captain Stubing.
Jo: From the Love Boat?
Helane: Yup.
Jo: That was the definitive answer last time.
Helane: I know.
Jo: Okay....BW?
BW: I am so good at this game.
HOW GOOD ARE YOU?BW: I am so good that I need my own show to shore up other peoples' intelligence.
Jo: BW...
BW: In fact, maybe I will start the BW Match Game.
Jo: BW....
BW: Of course, I will need to talk over a prime position. No sub-board stuff for me.
Jo: BW!
BW: What?
Jo: What is your answer?
BW: Captain Cab.
Jo: That IS definitive, but no match.
BW: Well, there goes my cable deal.
Jo: Lauren?
Lauren: How's it goin'?
Jo: Nice new phrase.
Lauren: Thanks.
Jo: Do you have an answer?
Lauren: Yes.
Jo: Will you tell me what it is?
Lauren: Yes.
Jo: Now?
Lauren: Sure.
Jo: Lauren?
Lauren: What?
Jo: Lauren!
Lauren: America.
Jo: *Blink blink* Okay....HD, take this.
HD: Thanks, Jo. Now, Claye has no matches so far. Did YOU match him?
Jo: Naturally.
H.M. Murdock.MelMac: Fowl!
HD: Will you can that? Judges?
Judge: That is indeed a match as HOWLING MAD was one of the many monikers that H.M. stood for. That is a match for Claye.
HD: Thanks, Judge. One point for Claye. Jo, take this.
Jo: Okay, Mel, you have to get one to tie and stay in the game or two to win and retain your title. Here was your Super Match clue:
Jo: What did you say, Mel?
MelMac: Well, even though this is the A-TEAM Match Game, we keep getting a lot of GAH answers, so I took the safe route and said a General that everyone would get.
Jo: Who?
MelMac: No, WOO.
Jo: Don't make me beat you with this microphone.
MelMac: Well, my second answer was better. I was going to say General Chow.
Jo: That WOULD have been a definitive answer for both GAH and the A-TEAM.
MelMac: But, I didn't as you know.
Jo: What DID you say?
MelMac: Patton?
Jo: Pardon?
MelMac: No, Patton.
General Patton.
Bill: Well, THIS is going to make it Rommel's war.
Patton: Is that supposed to be a joke, Missy?
MelMac: It's MelMac. A lot of people confuse it with the planet Alf is from or--
Patton: Somebody better shut this chattering monkey up!
Bill: Better be careful, Mel. He could think you are a pinko.
MelMac: Bill, the war is over.
Bill: Uh oh.
Patton: The war is WHAT!!
HD: I got it!
Patton: Good work, soldier. Carry on.
Jo: Alright, MelMac said Patton. Ms. B?
Ms. B: I was drunk again and couldn't remember any generals from either show.
Jo: Did you put Patton too?
Ms. B: Nope. I put something even better.
Jo: Dare I ask?
Ms. B: This is a great one. General ZOD.
Jo: *Blink blink* Okay....
Ms. B: He is one of my favorite villains.
Jo: Right. Helane?
Helane: After my last answer bottomed out, I am not too confident with this one.
Jo: Tell me anyway.
Helane: Stockwell...was he a general?
Jo: That IS a definitive answer, one of the TWO best! Great job, Helane. Just for that great answer, you won't go last next time either.
Helane: Thanks...waitaminute...
Jo: Sorry, time constraints. BW?
BW: I have the definitive answer for what this show is.
Jo: Oooookaaaay. But we are not after that.
BW: Do you want me to play or not?
Jo: Whatcha got?
BW: Mayhem.
Jo: Great answer, BW...but not a match. Lauren?
Lauren: What's the dilly yo?
Jo: I was gonna get up, but now I will just lay here. What was your answer?
Lauren: Fulbright...took me forever to think of it.
Jo: That is the OTHER definitive answer. Great work, Lauren, but no match. DG, take this.
DG: Thank you, Jo. You don't have to do dat, you know. I vill help host for fun of it.
Jo: I know, I know.
DG: Okay, MelMac, you must match Jo in order to stay in da round. Jo, vhat did you put?
Jo: Do I have to match Mel?
DG: You know dat you do.
Jo: I said "Fulbright."
Donner: We finally got a winner?!
Jo: That's right. Claye has one match and ousts reigning champion, MelMac. Claye, we will take a break here and be back next week for more A-TEAM Match Game with you and a new contestant. Potential candidates PM HoudiniDerek with your desire and we will set up the next round.
Jo: My thanks to the contestants, the panelists, the judges, Johnny Olson, and all the guest stars that have come by to play. For A-TEAM Match Game, I am Jo Rayburn saying "Goodnight!"
THESE TIE BREAKER ROUNDS OF A-TEAM MATCH GAME HAVE BEEN BROUGHT TO YOU BY:
The Big Swamp and Southern Railroad.Morticia: Gomez, didn't that fall into the Big Swamp?
Gomez: Egads, but you're right, Morticia. I will have to write them a check from the Second National Bank of Peking.
AND BY:THE US ARMYPatton: And all contestants and panelists get a free MRE...I have to clean out my freezer to defrost it.
Johnny: From the A-TEAM MATCH GAME, goodnight!